The turning of the "new year" has had me pondering something, especially this year. Sure, the new year brings new adventures and new endeavors. But this year, this year, the changes seem daunting to me. This year, we say goodbye to what has seemed like "the innocent years" for Lindsay. This year she will graduate from the comfort and safety of being on an "elementary school" campus and venture on into a new and frightening world....HIGH SCHOOL.
When you have a brain injured child, the younger years are tough in so so many ways, but it almost feels like the "younger" the child, the more accepting "the outside world" is to those with special needs.
Lindsay has always had such a vibrant and engaging personality,
She has been so easy to love. Everyone in her world has loved her. Loved her. I am not kidding.
But, it's easy to love the little ones. The children with special needs are so cute, so sweet, so innocent. Their teeth are small (well, not Lindsay's- haha), their needs are simplistic, they don't make people feel "uncomfortable".
They are so unassuming and approachable.
But, now with high school staring us in the face, I find myself doing more "fretting" than I am used to.
"Special" adults aren't as "cute" and they are certainly not as "approachable". Many adults avoid contact with people like that, and they don't teach their children how to react when they encounter them either.
Will Lindsay be loved and accepted in her new world, or will the teasing and bullying begin?
Will she even be able to tell if she is being teased?
To add to my stress, we recently had one of our appointments with a doctor who sees Lindsay every six months to reassess her physical therapy needs. At the end of the appointment, she came over to me and said, "She's so pretty" {huh?} I thought it was the strangest thing to say (but, I do realize that Lindsay is 5'8" tall, 130 pounds and WELL endowed). But then she continued, "I wouldn't be doing my job if I didn't tell you that that can be dangerous in her situation. These kids are easily taken advantage of." Oh.my.gosh. THAT never dawned on me! YIKES!! A new "worry" to add to the growing list.
and...NEXT YEAR SHE IS GOING TO A PUBLIC HIGH SCHOOL!?
My mind started going crazy with worry over Lindsay.
But, then I remembered something,
"I KNOW the plans I HAVE for you, says the LORD,
plans to prosper you AND NOT TO HARM YOU,
plans for a future and a hope."
Jeremiah 29:11
Phew! God has this all under control. HE HAS A PLAN!
HE didn't allow this to happen to Lindsay without ALL THINGS CONSIDERED!
As Mommys, we all have hopes and dreams for our children. Safety goes without saying, I suppose.While a physical or mental disability can shatter those "original dreams", it seems like God has given a compensating gift to these 'special' kids. It is part of His unbelievable, wonderful, marvelous GRACE.
If HE planned her life before she was born, if he knew she would suffer a life changing brain injury on June 12, 1998 at 8 months old, if He loves her with an EVERLASTING love...
HE CAN HANDLE HIGH SCHOOL.
and so can I.
*I am humbled and thankful every single day by the love my other two girls have for their sister. I don't have the benefit of a "sibling" so I am in awe of the relationship my girls have with each other. I am so grateful that they feel a sense of responsibility for Lindsay too. This "unconditional love" prompts them to be very protective over her.
It's beyond my understanding to think that our heavenly Father loves her more than we do.
(God gave me this gift a few weeks ago. Lindsay was "coloring" and I was cleaning up after she had gone to bed. I found THIS PICTURE! She is 14 years old and this is the first picture she has ever drawn all by herself of a person. LOOK at the DETAIL! We were all amazed. It's as if GOD HIMSELF was saying to me, "Inger! I've got this! Let go and TRUST ME to work my plan for Lindsay's life!" )
"Now to HIM who is able to do exceedingly abundantly ABOVE all that we ask or think, according to the power that works in us."
Ephesians 3:20